Saturday, July 11, 2009

Confused, puzzled, undecided !!

Once a procrastinator, always a procrastinator.

This statement comes from one of the greatest self - acclaimed procrastinator and that is me. After having wasted nearly whole of the summer semester, I have started feeling guilty now. It feels as if I am cheating myself. I had planned many things for these summers but I just kept on delaying things. I could not find any motivation to do anything and that is because I just don't know what I'd like to do in the future.

The luckiest person on the earth is that who knows what he wants to do and also gets to do it.

Life was pretty straight forward till class 12th. I knew what I had to do. I had set an aim for myself. But right now, everything seems hazy and unclear. Earlier, there was a desperation. A desperation to clear JEE. But after having cleared it, I have become complacent. In fact many IITians do. You start to think that your future is secured only to discover later that it was just a start of the journey.

I really miss the desperation. Desperation just energises you. There is nothing to lose. You give your heart and soul to your work. I seriously want to be restored to that class 12th phase. But unfortunately, like computers, we don't have any resotre points in life.

Do what you like and like what you do.

This really is the mantra for achieving success in the life and I am really glad that I have realized that. Earlier, phrases like 'job satisfaction' used to look so pompous. But off late, I have really realized its importance. After having spent last four years studying (or rather not studying) computer science, I know I will not be happy doing something which I can't even tolerate for a semester. Or so I think I can't tolerate. But in any case, I need to figure out something immediately and for that it is important to explore the options.

The question that I had kept on deferring since the last four years now lingers in front of my face and the answer needs to be found.


Chiya said...

I miss the desperation too :)

But, now I am feeling desperate to be desperate. can relate to this post.

all the best to you.

A Neophyte said...

Nice, atleast you are on a road to recovery :)

†J said...

I, too, wud agree wid Chiya...

But, now I am feeling desperate to be desperate. :-)

And so was the influence of this post of yours,that I ended up penning sumthing on this very aspect of my nature.

Kush said...


Finally this word appears prominently in your blog. I had spent my last few days in kanpur hearing this word from you again and again. :P
Sorry, but due to the above reasons, bad post.